on my plate.
well, my picture is literally what i had on my plate today; but i’ve also got a lot on my plate, figuratively speaking. a lot on my mind. lots of different things that take up space & time in my brain, causing me to loose focus sometimes. competing for attention. when i get so much on my mind, i can tend to lose myself in some way or another. at least that was how it was in my past life. but, i believe i learned that lesson (the hard way, of course). just having that awareness now makes it that much easier to not let that happen again.
instead, when i become aware of myself sliding back into the routine of feeling like i’m all over the place, i stop myself. take a breath. and do something that reconnects me with who i am. it also helps that my amazing wife is aware of my tendencies to forget myself, so she is constantly supporting, pushing, & challenging me to take care of myself, to enjoy the things that i love, to stay in touch with my soul. what an amazing wife!
anyway, after a pretty intense & busy week, ending with working at my old internship place last night until 2:00 am (the internship where i work with all kinds of teenagers out in the city), i was completely exhausted. i slept a little later than usual, but not so late. i enjoyed a lazy morning in bed and then made myself an american brunch just to celebrate my american-ness. this afternoon, i started to feel a headache creeping up, still felt drunkly tired from working so late, and within 30 minutes my headache was a full-blown migraine. you know, the kind where it hurts to look at any light or move your head in any direction kind of migraine. luckily my love got me a little medicine, and took care of me. at home this evening, my headache has completely disappeared, but i’m still taking it easy.
i am certain that my body has been speaking to me today…. saying for me to slow down. to take some hours to completely shut off and do nothing. so, i’m going to bed early, and planning a day of quiet rest tomorrow morning. gonna spend some relaxing time with my love later in the afternoon & then head with her to a musical tomorrow night. before that, nothing. i need to shut off my brain & my body. i’m listening to the little wake-up call i had today.
i’ve read 2 books in the past 2 weeks – not something i regularly do, and one of them has been amazing…. “traveling with pomegranates”. i am certain that i was meant to read it at this time in my life. the timing couldn’t have been any more perfect. i have a lot of notes & comments in the margins, so i’m gonna write them down & expand on them in my journal. i’m gonna meditate/do some yoga. i’m gonna drink lots of coffee and tea. perhaps watch a little downtown abbey, and sit in bed for hours.
it’s so important to remember to tap into my soul, to remember that i am free… free to be me.
so, though i have a lot on my plate, i feel like i’m balancing it all well. feels good to listen to what my soul needs. feels amazing to stay connected with myself. besides, what good am i to myself or to anyone else, if i don’t take care of me? for, it is only when i am still & silent that i can be emptied, and then filled again… ready to share myself with those i love and meet. it’s this little thing calling “being”. simply being who i was created to be. me. and when i tap into my being, then my doing naturally follows.
hope you find a little time to be free, to just be you, this next week. thoughts of love & peace coming your way…