how the moon teaches you to be authentically you; or the power of a full moon

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if you’re like me at all, things may have felt a little stuck lately. like nothing is going anywhere except in circles. i even said to a friend the other day that, while my mind and soul seem quite calm and at peace, my body feels all jittery and filled with energy. i’ve noticed it most whenever i  (try to) meditate. i just cannot seem to shake this feeling that there are balls of energy just bouncing all around within me. restless. unfocused. yearning to be released.

and, while i am breathing deeply and feeling very calm deep within my soul, there is something that is not quite right. and that is making me feel stuck, frustrated, like things aren’t progressing and i am not getting anywhere.

but believe me… things are happening, as they always are.

you know, we have no idea what’s going on, what’s happening as we are living in the moment, but when we look back, we see so clearly + understand so well that so much was going on even when we didn’t and couldn’t recognize or understand at the time.

enter june 2nd’s big, beautiful full moon.

even though it feels like nothing’s been happening, this is the time to have faith in the bigger more amazing life that is out there waiting for us. there is something big happening in the backdrop spiritually that may not be seen yet, but things are moving and bubbling. this is the time to begin to live life more authentically.

and the creative, powerful, magical energy of the full moon is helping to illuminate it all. (if we let it).

even though we feel frustrated + confused, the full moon also gives us large doses of energy. like that restless energy that seems to be bouncing all over my insides right now and for the last few weeks. it feels as if something has been building inside of me, and now is the time when the energy all around me is just begging me to let it out. it’s time for me to express myself.

it’s like i want to jump on things, get ahead, get busy. but, get busy doing what? i have no idea. which is a signal that i need to go within a bit before i get jumping on things.

it is great (and uncomfortable) to let that energy move around inside of us, inspiring us, but to also hold back a bit. to let the energy and beauty of the moon soak into us, grounding ourselves and bringing to light the things that are deep within us. things like our deepest desires and intentions. so, though we feel like jumping ahead, it’s a perfect time during this full moon to actually slow down and let the energy ferment and transform us. it’s time to discern and trust our intuition. time to let our higher selves, our spiritual selves, our soul, guide us right now.

there is so much for us to discover deep within.

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so, it’s time for us to stop trying to figure things out, and to just be. to just feel. to just live. to just keep on keeping on. it’s time to trust.

and, when we do that, when we slow down, then it becomes much easier to trust the wisdom that is within. we already know and have everything that we need. it’s just to let it all be revealed to us. and a full moon can help us do just that.

of course, when i say that we need to just sit and be does not mean that we are inactive. the way to deal with the frustrations of the day, with the feelings that nothing is happening is to ground ourselves: to meditate, get outside in nature, journal, create art, let music flow, rest, cook, sleep and rest, spend time alone.

when we reconnect with our soul, then we can finally begin to discern our personal truth.

this is the time for us to express our authenticity. to live from our soul, to be totally free to be who we are. but, in the excitement of living authentically, three is the balance of discernment + discovery, of taking the time to hear what our soul is saying to us. to not just jump on any- and everything, but to really sit with ourselves and feel our intuition guiding us in finding the way to live life fully as we are meant to live.

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the truth we are searching for is our personal truth. under the full moon we gather all of our dreams, hopes, ambitions, desires, passions, and goals. this full moon reminds us of the potential of living life in our own truth, that anything is possible as long as we remain in our personal truth.

it is not time to listen to all of the practical murmurs from others all around us, but instead time to listen to what our souls need, to live into our birthright and to live life as we are created to live it.

the full moon reminds + inspires us to live authentically.

it’s time to discover who we really are, to dig deep + ground ourselves in some simple practices that help us listen to our souls. and, as june progresses, as we continue to uncover + recover who we really are, our life will become that much more worthwhile and we will be prepared to live a life that makes a difference to others and to the world around us.

this full moon can help us take the next steps in living life to the fullest, to finding a higher, more spiritual way of experiencing life.

she will be full and magical and powerful. it’s time for us to tap into our authentic selves and soak in the energy that tells us that everything is possible as long as we keep to our personal truth. feel it. listen to your soul.

believe in yourself and discover what it means to live life on your own path.

onwards + upwards! xoxo

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5 things to do while you’re sitting in your sh*t

“Disappointment, without anger, is the mark of an old soul. Not being disappointed, Liz, is the mark of a really old soul. And trusting life so thoroughly that every step on its path is valued more than where it was supposed to take you, is the mark of eternal youth.”

You hottie,
The Universe (14 may 2015)

yesterday i got a rejection email following up on an interview i had aw week or so ago. they said it was stiff competition between me and another person. i felt pretty good about the job. or did i? i don’t know these days. it’s hard to not let my desperation to find a job and make money not override my sense of who i am and how i want to live my life. in any case. it feels sucky that they decided to go with the other person.

now, i can choose to focus on the things that go wrong, or scare me, or make me wake up in the middle of the night and fill my head with anxiety, or bring me down.

or, i can choose to focus on things that make me feel good. whole. complete. and down right ok with everything, choosing to trust that things will work out.

by focusing on the good, i am not eliminating or running away from the bad. nope. i still feel it all. and i let myself feel it for a bit.

my brother likes to call it “sitting with it.”

you sit with your shit. just let it be. just let yourself cry. or curl up into a ball. let yourself have a bad day, a day when you feel off. let yourself unwind. admit to yourself how things really are. all of which i did last night and this morning.

and while you’re sitting with it, might i suggest a few things to help you get through. just so you know, friends, these are 5 things i’ve done this week. 5 things that have reminded me to smile + to breathe. even though i’ve not been feeling tip top. even though disappointment + stress are following me around. still, these 5 things, have helped me to maintain as much balance as possible.

1. express yourself (talk. express what you are feeling, or not. just get some positive people around you.)

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wedding planning with lina’s brother + his fianceé. lina + i are the reception emcees!

2. get inspired (listen to music, play music, read, create art, write, look at art, take some photos, cook/bake)

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my work space for the past 2 weeks: writing my book always refocuses me.

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made a yummy dinner!

3. watch something on netflix/tv (just veg for a little bit)

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a glass of wine + some tv. yesssss.

4. go inside (and by inside, i mean, inside your self. light some candles + meditate.)

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my little sitting place for morning meditations.

5. go outside (get moving. exercise. change your environment. fill your wild soul with some nature.)

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a walk by the river in downtown uppsala

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the sun was shining, so i had to get out + walk in my neighborhood.


there is a fine line, though, i think between letting ourselves just sit with it, and getting stuck.

there is nothing wrong with redirecting our attention. you know, avoidance. by going to exercise, or surrounding ourselves with someone who lifts our spirits, or obsessing over beautiful things on pinterest, or watching our favorite netflix series, or just sleeping. anything that calms us down and gives us a little sense of peace of mind for a little bit is a good thing.

but there’s a deeper way of “sitting with it”. once we’ve gone away from the pain and disappointment for a bit, then i believe it’s time to deal with it. and by that, i mean to reflect on it, analyze, ponder, question, and yes, feel whatever feelings bubble up. the point is to understand what is going on and why we are feeling this way. and, of course, this can be done alone or with someone else. i personally prefer a little of both. but, it needs to be done.  it is a necessary part of moving on.

then, it’s time to stand up again.

there comes a time when we just need to choose to say that we are done with this shit for now. and that’s when the action starts. that’s when everything changes. that’s when we begin to move on.

sitting with it is healthy i think. it means that we admit that things are not great. and that we don’t run away from those feelings and thoughts of things being not great. but, sitting with it means that we also take an active role in making it better. we don’t just sit there, like a lump on a log, crying “poor me!”. we admit that we feel that way, and we don’t judge those feelings, but then we begin to wonder why we feel that way and what we can do to move past those feelings.

so, whenever you feel like crap and you’re having a day from hell. admit it. feel it. and don’t feel bad about it. redirect yourself towards something that you enjoy, something that makes you feel calm. and then, do the work to help you get yourself out of the shit. figure stuff out and know that you will not feel like this forever.

and then, stand up, brush yourself off, and start moving forward again.

sending you lots of love + courage + strength.

onwards + upwards! xoxo

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meditation mondays: get alone + discover your dreams

this past weekend i hibernated at home mostly. something that i absolutely must do every now and then. ok, ok. i want to hibernate at home more often than i want to admit. but, i chalk that up to my introverted nature. i mean, a meditating vacation + pilgrimage to india sounds like heaven to me. but, so does a road trip across europe or the states.

oh, sure, i am a people person – as in i love meeting people, traveling + experiences different cultures, and challenging myself to put myself out there as much as possible. so, somewhere along the way, somehow, someday, i learned the art of balancing my introverted nature with the extroverted actions needed to follow my bliss. but, my inner soul is an old soul, yearning to sit with a cup of coffee, or a glass of wine, reading, writing, meditating, pondering, chatting, just being. this is when i feel the most connected to myself + to the world.

so, ultimately, i crave time alone. i need it like we need air to breathe. and by time alone, i mean it in three different ways: time spent truly all by myself, time spent only with my wife, and time spent with one or two friends/clients/students/co-workers. this is where i thrive. on the other hand, i also thrive when speaking in front of people, telling stories, inspiring + challenging them. i know. i’m a bit of a mixed-up, both/and kind of person.

but, at the end of the day, for all of the time that i spend with people, i need to be by myself. i need to find some solitary moments every single day to check in with myself, to remind myself what is important in life, to listen to my soul, to reflect and dream and plan. my alone time helps to keep me centered and aware and present. i’m like a living, breathing labyrinth journey. daily walking the path into the center of the labyrinth in order to be alone. and then walking back out again, ready to engage the world. my alone time is my reset button. my reminder of who i am + who i want to be.

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this weekend, in the midst of all of my cozy time reading, writing, and vegging in front of the tv, i also had some time to soak up the presence of others. one tiny little part of a conversation a stuck with me. it was about dreams. someone told me that they don’t have dreams. they have never really thought about it. this is something, i realized in that moment, that i take for granted.

doesn’t everybody dream?

yes, i believe so. but, i believe we bury our dreams deep inside us. then, especially as we grow older, we forget about them. or we assume that our dreams are silly and impossible. we completely empty our brains of the thoughts that dreams are a part of life. it’s not that we become cold or hard or bitter, we just move on. we just keep doing what we do. and dreams become irrational fairy tales.

somehow, because of some of the things that have happened to me/i chose to make happen (i.e. the break-up of my first marriage, quitting my job, leaving my home country), i opened myself up to the dreams that i had years ago. or, perhaps, my introverted, carefree, idealistic nature never let those dreams go. whatever the reason, i made a conscious decision to do everything that i can to make my dreams come true. and i mean that i literally, consciously said to myself that i refused to let myself grow old and be that person who looked back on her life saying, “i wonder what it would have been like to…” or “i wonder if i had done…”. yes, i literally consciously had a moment when i decided that those questions would never, ever be a part of my life. no way was i going to fill my one, short life with anything less than magical moments, adventures, and love. and in that moment, anything became possible. dreams became goals. i realized that there are no hinders, no problems, no impossibilities. only solutions.

however, also in that moment, i had no idea what my dreams were. really.

and now, seven years later, i realize that dreams evolve and change. and, when you realize one dream, another one appears. or, perhaps one dream you had morphs into something completely different. or, you dreamed one thing, and it turned out to look completely different than you had planned. it’s not always easy to hammer down what our dreams are.

and, that’s why i love being alone. that’s why i need to spend time alone.

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i need to let myself dream and wonder and be in awe. it’s not about living for the future, but it is about living in the present and feeling what your soul is saying to you right then and there.

but, when my alone time is over, then it’s time to get out there + make those dreams happen, always returning back to myself to check in and listen to my soul again. remember, the labyrinth thing?

yes, we are all wired differently. some of us love the attention and energy of being around crowds of people. and some of us love the quiet, solitary moments alone. most of us are somewhere in between. but, all of us need both. it is a balancing act. and we all teeter one way more than the other. the challenge is to let ourselves spend some time alone or push ourselves out into the world. both places are where we find inspiration. we hear our soul and we encounter the souls of others. and this, in the middle this balancing act, is where dreams are born. dreams that most definitely, with a little bit of openness, trust, and a whole lot of work, can be made a reality.

all we gotta do first is believe.

onwards + upwards!! xx

do you take the time to dream? what are your dreams right now in life? share them with me – and i’ll cheer you on!