create + inspire lbgtqai+

one little comment is all it takes.

24 Nov 2012

i got a comment the other day from the mezz which touched me deeply. and i’ve been thinking alot about it ever since…

she said, in her comment, that she was glad that i had written a post where i did some complaining. that it reminded her that i am human, and that i have difficult times too.  i truly appreciate her comment. it made me feel free.

i focus so much on positive things here on my blog, and in life. i try my best to acknowledge the beauty, the positive, and the good in every day, even if every moment isn’t fabulous.

however, in the middle of all of the beauty & amazingness of life, i do have tough times. things don’t always go smoothly, and sometimes i feel overwhelmed, lost, sad, frustrated, and scared. i don’t always write about it here. but, every now & then, things just creep out onto my keyboard – like they are doing now.

whether you know it, remember it, or have never heard it, my love was in the hospital for 3 months this summer. it was a really tough & scary time for her. and for me. very tough & scary. in ways that i cannot even begin to describe. i wondered if i was going to lose her.   now she has been home for a while, but is still receiving treatment. we’re doing our best to live life, and i think we have been doing a pretty good job. but, lately, things have been getter harder.

i don’t feel like i’m being fake by posting positive, inspiring things. or by showing the amazing moments of our life, because there are tons of amazing moments. but, the tough stuff that we are dealing with right now, is real. it’s just that we choose to keep it private. on the other hand, i don’t want people to think that everything just moves along smoothly for me and i wake up feeling peace every day. because it doesn’t . and i don’t. as the mezz points out, i’m human. and shit happens.

however, i need inspiration & the positive vibes in my life. i want those things. i want to wake up & love life, not live with regrets or in fear. i want to suck every amazing thing out of life that i can. i need to remember to be aware of the beauty in life. and so, here, in my little place in cyberspace, i try to make a beautiful little corner that brings me joy & peace. and if i provide any joy or peace to anyone else along the way, then i am doubly blessed. you see, this place, this blog, heals me. writing fills me. it is my breath. one of my ways of meditating. of stripping away the negative and focusing on being true to myself & my soul.

i truly admire any of you who put your whole self out there, who bitch & complain, and vent & get pissed off, and share your deepest, darkest thoughts & feelings. sometimes i wonder about doing that. but, then, i remember my “niche”. and belovelive is all about being who i am. learning to love myself & others. and living life to the fullest. perhaps one day i’ll create another blog, or perhaps i will just add to this one. but, for now, this is who i am. this is how i write. and when there are tough times, i will either keep it to myself, or share it with you all… i will just let it happen naturally.

in the meantime, whatever positive vibes, prayers, or thoughts you might have for my little family right now would be greatly appreciated. i deeply thank you for your presence here, and for your willingness to stumble through all my words. and i am so grateful for the comments i receive. your thoughtful words inspire me & push me to think more deeply than before. your presence influences me & touches me, reminding me that i am never alone.

as always, when there is something heavy on my heart, i face it head on. mediate on it. write about it (privately or otherwise), and talk though it with a trusted soul. but, i face it knowing that, bigger than the sadness or pain or uncertainty that i feel, the light always conquers the darkness. love always wins. there is always hope. and life remains beautiful. i have the complete joy of living this life, with all of its ups & downs, mountains & valleys, and soaking in the messiness and the perfection and everything in between that makes up this journey of mine.

and i know from deep within my soul that tomorrow is another day. another day to share with my love. another day to embrace & experience as much as possible.

another day to…

my heartfelt gratitude & warm wishes of peace to you all.

No Comments

  • Reply Laura4NYC 24 Nov 2012 at 00:32

    I am sorry you two are going through a rough time and I hope that your wife, whatever has occurred to her, will heal and become healthy once again. I can understand that you want to keep it personal ( I rarely share too intimate topics on my blog myself) and respect your decision to keep it private. All the best wishes to you and her!

    • Reply liz 1 Dec 2012 at 00:09

      Thank you for your wishes and thoughts. It truly means a lot to us both!

  • Reply strollingturtle 24 Nov 2012 at 02:34

    Beautiful post…thanks for sharing that little bit about you and your love’s personal challenges. I appreciate and understand you wanting to stay focused on the positive and on celebration of life and love. And you give so much to all of your readers by doing so. However, sharing as you just did in this post, and the other you mentioned receiving a comment about, allows we your readers to appreciate a bit more what is involved in your being you, loving life and living…..AND allows us to maybe give back a bit to you and the form of a prayerful thought or positive vibe sent your way. Thanks for being here and blogging…whatever you choose to share I am enriched by reading it. HUGS to you both!!

    • Reply liz 1 Dec 2012 at 00:10

      Beautiful comment! Thank you so much for your kind words, and for reminding me that what I share here goes out to the world, but many of you hold on to it and send good thoughts & vibes back to me. It is a community we have created here in this blogosphere, isn’t it? I am so grateful for your words & hugs!

  • Reply Tracy 24 Nov 2012 at 04:25

    Aw Liz, very sorry you two are hitting this rough patch. And while it’s great to keep on the upbeat side of things, it’s also cathartic to “vent”, yeah? It’s more than “letting off steam”- it’s about sharing things that others can relate to. In doing so, you become three-dimensional (as you’ve found here). Of course, there’s good venting & then there’s “whining”- lol. That’s the kind where it’s 24/7 complaining with no room left for gratitude.

    I think you’re doing a wonderful job of exposing just enough of your “dark times” to keep an interest without divulging that which you hold as private. I personally appreciate your optimism in the face of challenge. Keep doing what you’re doing- and no, you’re definitely NOT alone. 🙂

    • Reply liz 1 Dec 2012 at 00:12

      It actually did feel soooo good to vent. 😉 And, yes, it does make me more human, more 3-dimentional. It is so beautiful to be reminded that I am not alone. And I truly feel the presence of those of you who read my blog, I feel your presence & your thoughts, tracy. Thank you so much!

  • Reply luggagelady 24 Nov 2012 at 07:02

    Prayers and hugs to you and your love…Your attitude is beautiful — touching and inspiring to so many!

    • Reply liz 1 Dec 2012 at 00:13

      Thank you so much! I truly & deeply appreciate your prayers & hugs! So glad to have met you!

  • Reply Mridula 26 Nov 2012 at 13:46

    Here is something for you 🙂

    Cheers! 😀

    • Reply liz 1 Dec 2012 at 00:13

      Wow! Thank you so much!!! I am honored!

  • Reply lanie belluz 27 Nov 2012 at 19:18

    I remember you mentioning Lina was not well and reading on to see what was wrong. I also enjoyed that post with the comment that fueled this post. I liked the human aspect of your writing – not that I dont enjoy your inspiration as well. I hope things get better and the holidays are smooth and well!

    • Reply liz 1 Dec 2012 at 00:15

      Lanie, I truly am appreciative for your thoughts, and for urging me to continue to let my human side be a part of my writing. Looking forward to hopefully seeing you & C in January! 🙂

  • Reply kate1975 14 Jan 2013 at 13:41

    I’m so sorry for what yous have been dealing with. I am thinking of yous. Good and healing thoughts to you both.


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