You know how life sometimes just seems to happen to us? Like that feeling of having the rug ripped out from under us or the surprise of an amazing opportunity that falls into our laps. Well, I have come to realize that these moments aren’t necessarily always as sudden as we think. In fact, there are almost always signs that we can read or whispers from our soul or messages from the universe that are quietly preparing + guiding us. The key is to listen. To live a life that is open and aware and expectant. And then to move in tune with the flow of it all.
You see, all throughout September, I had this sense of completion + fulfilment welling up within me. I was totally aware of it, though I had no idea where the feeling or thought or sensation came from.
Perhaps it was the energy swirling around me that was obvious in the changing of the seasons. The completion of summer, the coming harvest, and the graceful movement of Mother Earth from light to the balance of the equinox to the darkness of longer nights.
Perhaps it was the completion of another year in my life as I celebrated my 43rd birthday on the 24th of September. A feeling of fulfilment and the turning of time.
Perhaps it was the sense of deep spiritual inward fulfilment from the past 10 years. A milestone and a marker. It has now been 10 years since I decided to get divorced, quit my job, change my life, and move to Europe. But, more than those external things… those decisions were made based from my internal acceptance + choice to live my life as I choose. To set myself free. To die to my old life, so that I might create a new one. And, honestly, I feel totally done with that part of my life. That phase of discovery + breaking free + making it happen is now completely complete.
Most likely, it is all of these things coming together all at the same time. All of these literal endings, symbols of the completion from the universe. And I’ve been basking in it all. Feeling it. Immersing myself in it. Sitting with it.
But, now September has come to a close. And, just as I was about to shut the door or turn the page, one last little thing popped up. And it’s not actually little. It’s huge. Something that has shifted the way that Lina and I thought that we were going to move into the deeper, cozier, more settled days of autumn. It has been a “rug being pulled out from under us” (from her) kind of moment for us.
And, yet, as we have begun to let it sink in + have discussed it all this weekend, it is most definitely the final piece to fulfil September’s energy of completion.
So, while external happenings may be unexpected, they may not be surprising when we understand them in light of the energy flowing around + within us. For, right now, it all makes sense. It all feels right, in the sense of being purposeful and meant to be. It all feels like it is flowing as it should.
Speaking of flow, that leads me directly into the energy that I already feel arising for October. And, before I go further, I must admit, I am becoming more + more comfortable with trusting my intuition. My sense of understanding of what is swirling about me. And, just because I may say that I feel one thing right now, as we flow into October, does not mean that I will feel the same in the end. In all likelihood, if I am open to evolvement, I will feel differently, even if the energy I intuit now remains the same.
So, what am I feeling on this first day of October?
Well, I am feeling a sense of wisdom + depth. A deep, internal, reflective, vibe. Like really, really deep. A plunge into truth – my truth, your truth. A chance to not focus at all on what I can do for others (stay with me, I know this sounds selfish), but on who I am now… on a deeper, higher level than I’ve ever considered before. And the reason for the deep inward focus is not to be selfish, but it is to delve into my truth, so that I might discover even more about how I might be used in this next phase of my life.
October feels like a vision quest. A month of basking in the beauty of the world, celebrating the little moments, offering gratitude for every little thing, and especially for exploring the deep, dark, sacred wisdom that lies within. And then, embracing my wisdom + truth as I seek to align even more with my life’s continued calling.
In other words, I am feeling that October just might be a month to spend time alone (and with my wife) in search of my personal vision that becomes a vision to support my community + the world.
Perhaps this month, as we flow into the mystery and beauty of the middle of autumn, is a time of ritual + preparation. Since I felt the ending of the energy of completion + fulfilment with the ending of September, there must be a new phase, a new chapter, a higher level, another sacred beginning waiting in the wings. And, before I simply jump into it, since I have no feelings or intuitions at all about what that phase might be, October seems to be emerging as the month of visioning + grounding. Of facing and feeling and listening to it all. Struggles. Pain. Fears. Awe. Dark. Light. Death. Life. Balance. Paradox. Earth. The heavens. Ancestors. Spirit. My soul.
So, my goals this month all revolve around the idea of a vision quest. Of stealing away moments to myself, of being even more intentional than usual, of celebrating rituals + giving offerings of gratitude, of reflecting, of seeking ancient wisdom from within + from others, of communing with nature, of journeying together with my love through the continued changes.
I expect it to be a very quiet, lovely, magical month. And I set my intentions for just that.
In working towards holding those intentions, I have decided to do 2 things:
→ Commit to 3 blog posts a week + a newsletter on the weekends (it’s been way too frickin’ long since I last sent one out).
→ Create a focus, building on my theme of vision quest, for each week throughout October.
Should you wish to read more about the focus that I will have for each week, please feel free to sign up for my newsletter → here. I will send out tips on how you can embark on your own vision quest that will help you listen +discern to what your soul is guiding you to in life. Plus, I will share a vision quest-related focus for each week. And I am really pumped about this.
In the meantime, wild souls, thanks for reading + for checking in. And, a most sacred + mystical October to you!