the week that was not glamorous, but oh so radiant // 16

i’ve been staring at this cursor on my computer screen for i don’t know how long. the reason? i plugged in my headphones, opened up spotify, and searched for “the breakfast club” soundtrack (i  have a reason for searching for this: i am going to be teaching a lesson on american high schools, using the breakfast club movie, at work in a few weeks). what i found, though, was so much better. an entire playlist created by some genius that gathered together all of the best freaking songs from the 80s. i mean… seriously. f*ucking amazing. and i know that i am showing my age, or perhaps not cool to some of you anymore, but i don’t care one little bit.

i grew  up in the 80s, and these songs that are playing through my headphones have got me like all crazy + wild. i’m sure my dear wife, who’s sitting beside me in her own little computer world is freaking tired of me, wondering what the hell is going on with me,  as i silently lip-sync and bouncy dance on my side of the bed. bless her patient heart. 

but, i’ve been right here. singing + dancing away. rockin’ it out. memories and feelings and smells and thoughts flowing. realizing that i know the words of every damn song on this insanely awesome playlist. and i can barely bring myself to type because i am so busy relieving my childhood/teenage years.

i am trying, though, to tone it down a bit and type up this post. of course, pausing when each new amazing song begins for a mini dance party. ok. here we go.

this past week was nothing but regular, but i also realize that regular, ordinary days are not regular or ordinary at all. it’s really all dependent upon what kind of perspective we choose to have,

well, i did my regular, ordinary things this week: meditate, drink coffee, prepare meals, watch tv series, take photos, walk, have meetings, counsel students, sleep, blog, repeat.

these things are not boring at all to me. they may be my reality, my everyday life. not glamorous or adventurous. but, hidden within each of them are moments of deep meaning, inspiration, and spirit. and i choose to suck the marrow out of life, thereby turning regular, ordinary things into extraordinary moments. (like bouncy-dancing on the bed to 80s music on a sunday morning).

so, it really is all about how we choose to live life. what we choose to see and feel and do. who we choose to be. and whether we just go through the motions or whether we make even our most boring  moments something special.

for me… that means slowing down to notice life. and infusing positivity + joy into as much as i can.

i will have to say that there was one huge thing that happened this week.

one day, when i came home from work, my loved had prepared an incredible surprise for me. she had cooked me dinner!! this is an major, major deal for her + for our family. because of her anorexia relapse, she has not cooked anything in over a year. but, without me knowing anything at all, she planned (with her therapist) to cook and have dinner waiting for me when i got home one day this past week.

i was blown away. amazed. proud. excited. it was incredible. my love is incredible and the strongest, most inspiring fighter i have every met.

watch the video below to see her accomplishment + my reaction!! so. much. fun.

 

oh yeah! i did find out about my job – how much i am going to work, and when. and, it turns out that i am beginning my full-time, five days a week work… tomorrow! so, from this week until the end of this school year, i’ll be working every day. no more mondays off. which feels pretty ok to tell you the truth. i am embracing this change, knowing that it all will make sense soon. during the summer, i’ll have mondays off. and then, after my vacation, i’ll be back to five days a week again when the school year starts.

it feels balanced + good. and motivating, actually. yes, i am kinda freaked out. but, i read something this morning  (from joseph campbell, of course!) that really spoke to me:

“any work whatsoever can be a meditation if you have the sense that everything is Brahman…. the return is seeing radiance everywhere… the town that you come back to is the one you left, otherwise the journey is not complete. you comeback to whatever you regard as the place that is your life, to the same career, not necessarily the same locale. the yoga disciplines are the disciplines. they are not the place”

you see, i know that i have been on a long journey. one that has taken place over about 8 years or so. and i know that with 2016, i have moved on to a new phase, a new level, a new understanding. the disciplines of 8 years have brought me back to the same place, but with a completely different understanding of life. a true understanding + experience of the radiance in everything.

i don’t know what this all means or what it all will look like as time passes, but i feel deeply that my job, my work, my passions, who i am, are all wrapped up together and that, even though i set aside time for quiet, personal mediation everyday, all of life has become one long mediation for me.

it’s so hard to put this into words, but it is something that i am working on. gathering together some thoughts + writings so that i can share them all in a series of posts later on.

in the meantime… i just keep doing what i do. i just keep being who i am. and let life unfold.

so, my friends, how was your week? what did you do? how did you feel? sending you lots of love and light as you end your weekend, and begin a new week filled with tough moments, adventures, ordinary chores, and tiny little beautiful moments.

xoxo. liz.