For one brief second this past weekend, I believed that spring was truly on its way. Well, I suppose it actually is on its way, but it is just taking its own sweet time in arriving up here in the nordic lands. Perhaps it’s the same for you, fellow North American friends, wherever you are. You see, within the course of 24 hours, for the past month, we have had rain, hail, snow, sunshine and wind. And that literally happens just about every day. The peeks of sun are enough to sustain me, and yet, at the same time, enough to drive me spring fever crazy.
Easter has come + gone. The calendar says the end of April. It is time. But, no. We are having what the Swedes call “April weather”. You never know what you are gonna get. But, it ain’t gonna be warmth, which this southern girl from the States thinks of when she things of April. April showers? Yes. But, warm-ish April showers. Ok. Enough of my complaining. Here’s a little story instead…
On Sunday, we were busy at home in the morning and early afternoon. The sun peeked out, between thick gray clouds, and I felt a twinge of hope. Then, the clouds became a bit more white + fluffy, with dots of blue sky and full on sunshine. I pulled on a sweatshirt, slipped on my birkenstocks, and high-tailed it to the backyard. I stood there, face to the sun, soaking it up. Feeling the warmth, the hope, the possibilities. I even slipped off my shoes + set my feet on the cold, new grass. And then, I had a brilliant idea. There was enough blue sky that it warranted me going down into the basement + officially bringing up our lawn chairs for the season. Haaaaalllelujah!
It took me all of 10 minutes to do that, and I ran outside with a chair, a book, and a cup of coffee. I set up the chair, looked around, and shivered. The sun was gone. Thick gray clouds literally covered the entire sky. The wind was cold. I couldn’t do it. It was too cold to be outside. TEN f-ing minutes had passed and it was like a January day in North Carolina. I stomped inside again, leaving my chair in the backyard, as if to try to make Mother Nature feel bad for taking away my warm, sunny moment. Pissed to the max.
But, this is how it is. This is how it has been. I really, really tried to live in the moment, but the moment didn’t last. Moments never really do last, though, do they? Then they wouldn’t be moments. I realized what I was trying to do was to control the moment. I was refusing to accept it for what it was and then let it go, as it should. I was trying to extend the moment so that it lasted as long as I wanted it to. Just like I am trying to will spring to come to Sweden by sitting and pining and fuming over the ridiculous weather here.
These photos were literally within the same hour. Sunshine. Hail. Then it snowed. No lie. And now it’s partly sunny again. It will rain soon. I promise.
The thing is, the seasons are changing. The transition is happening. And it isn’t that hard to see. The grass is (a tiny bit) greener, tight buds are on some of the trees, early flowers are popping up, birds chirp constantly, and this wacky weather is obviously in its own state of transition. It really is happening. Ever so slowly. At nature’s pace. The cycle is continuing, the signs are all there, I have just wanted it to be instantaneous. And, now that I write that down, I realize how absurd + silly + selfish that is. Because the magic is in the process. The ability to sit + observe + watch the change of the seasons literally take place is just pure freaking magic.
Today we have a new moon. That I have finally slowed down and gained some perspective about my slow-changing season on this day of a new moon has not been lost on me. The new moon is when the sky is black + dark, with only the stars. I mean, the moon is there, we just can’t see her. She’s always there. But, it is a significant moment each month that invites us to take pause. To observe the beauty of the cycle of the cosmos and our place in it. And to symbolically begin again. The darkness is like a clean slate. A chance to intuitively set intentions and start over.
During this new moon phase, it is also a time for appreciating what we have, and not simply leaping forward to whatever comes next. In the dark, we must move more slowly, be more careful, rely on our awareness + intuition to help guide us. It’s a reminder that life will play out as it will. It all unfolds just as it should. And, sometimes, we have to simply wait + trust. We know that changes are occurring, we know that life does not move at our speed, and so the new moon reminds us to slow down. To observe, accept, and align. To just be.
When + what fruits will be born of the seeds we sow will be revealed in good time. And, looking back, we will understand all that we have been through. We can already do that now in our lives. So, why not begin again today? Let’s pause for a moment and look back. Reflect. And then, observe the present moment. Accepting + not trying to make it into anything else than what it is. Let’s trust in this moment + set an intention to move with nature. To let life unfold. To be true to who we are. To create each moment, as it is, as a way to connect even more with our true, higher self.
We may be waiting for something to happen (like me waiting for spring) or we may dreaming of what is to come (like me waiting for spring), but in spending all of my present moments doing that, I am not actually experiencing my present moments. Instead, I am missing out on those moments that make up my life. What if we accepted + believed that where we are right now, in this moment, is exactly where we are meant to be? If we trusted that all shall be well?
May this new moon, and the powerful, magical cycle of nature, remind us to simply be.
“You can till the soil and set seeds of intention but you can’t control the weather, nor how many fruits will ultimately sprout from your seedlings.
“This Moon says rest, look at what you have, let go of worrying about what you don’t have.
“A wide trine to the North Node from the Moon suggests all is as it should be right now. Just keep following the signs.
“Focus on what is right in front of your nose and forget the rest.
“Venus, ruler of this lunation is on the anaretic last degree of Pisces. Surrender with an open heart.“
– LEAH WHITEHORSE