“the most important thing is to find out what the most important thing is” wrote shunryu suzuki in his book zen mind, beginner’s mind. that’s your assignment for the next three weeks. do whatever it takes to find our beyond any doubt what the most important thing is. meditate naked an hour a day. go on long walks in the wildest places you know. convene intense conversations about yourself with the people who know you best. create and sign a contract with yourself in which you vow to identify the experience you want more than any other experience on earth. no waffling allowed, libra. what is the single most important thing?
that’s what i read this morning when i randomly picked up a random local newspaper. it was open to this paragraph, my horoscope. now, i’m not an astrology believer or anything. i don’t read my horoscope regularly. but, like many of y’all (i hope!), i check it out from time to time, cause it’s fun.
when i sat down in a cozy red chair, took a sip of my coffee, and picked up the newspaper, my eyes fell directly on this horoscope reading for today. as i read those words, i knew it was one of those little moments where i received a message that i was meant to hear. it’s not voo doo, astrology, magical stuff. it was just words that spoke to my soul, that challenged and encouraged me to use the next few weeks to focus.
you see, i’ve been thinking about blogging a book. like, writing it out here. and publishing it post by post. so, it is an ongoing, over time, fluid, kind of revelation. and then, when i complete the book, i will have had all of your feedback in addition to actually getting it done. win win, situation, huh?
now, i’m not really sure what i am going to write about yet. or, i suppose i have some ideas about it. but, it was clear to me that with this beautiful message today, i should take the time to just soak in all of my thoughts and not jump to any hasty decisions. however, i am completely excited about this project, and while i will be heeding the advice i read in the paper, i also want to get started as soon as possible…
i’m anxious to get started because tomorrow is my 39th birthday, so i’ve got one more year until the big forty. and you know what? that doesn’t scare me at all. it actually thrills me! it makes me want to celebrate, so i’m gonna do just that. i am going to celebrate all year long. by writing a book. and in my book, i’m gonna chronicle and share my journey from 39 to the big 4-0. it’ll be my 52 weeks to 40.
what all of this will include, what i will write, how often, and everything else will be determined as time passes. but, i do know that i will be celebrating. life has given me so much. i have had dream after dream, and i have decided to make some crazy decisions in order to follow those dreams. but, you know, i have many more dreams left. so, this coming year, i am going to spend an entire year reflecting, giving thanks, celebrating, and dreaming. i am going to spend this year living life and writing all about it. i can’t freaking wait!
tomorrow the journey begins. and in the beginning, i am going to to do research. research about myself, my dreams, and what is the one thing that is the most important. i’ll meditate, talk, write, walk, and just be. and, in the end of three weeks, i will write that contract. and sign it, with a witness, just to make it even that more binding. and i am certain that this contract, this covenant with myself, will be the guiding compass for my book. perhaps, i will even end up writing about my single most important thing… as i discover it from week to week.
you know, there is a wisdom that comes with age, and passing the milestone of 40 should mean that i have something to pass on to others. and i think i do. so, that’s what i am going to blog about. all that i’ve learned about life so far because of the experiences i’ve had… to celebrate it, live it to the fullest, be exactly who you are, chase your dreams, and enjoy the journey of discovering your own single most important thing.
while i’m doing all of this, i invite you, my dear readers, to weigh in on the book i am going to blog… tell me your thoughts. give me your suggestions and ideas. what do you think about me writing more memoir-ish or more present moment-ish. or perhaps both? share with me your amazing opinions. because, while i’m writing this book for me, as a spiritual journey from 39 to 40, i am also writing it for you.
no waffling, now. it’s time. time to celebrate and write and get this done! and i can’t wait to share it all with you. xx