corona diaries

How the new moon, sunshine, and family lifted me: My Corona Diaries

30 May 2020

I cannot seem to catch up with these posts. I keep thinking I’m going to get two done in one weekend, but it ain’t happening. I am still a week behind, so this post is not from this past week, but from May 18-24ish. A week that was so much better than the week before. Turns out all I needed was a few days off, a birthday celebration, sunny weather, and the energy of a new moon to draw me out of my funk. Oh, nothing has really changed. And, as I write this, I feel the world spiraling out of control again. But, once again, the simple things – nature, family, slow living – helped me to regain perspective + settle my soul.

I worked three intense days at the beginning of the week (from home, of course). But, then, had a four day weekend. And Mother Nature showed up with some absolutely beautiful weather.

The time off began with a birthday dinner for my love. We celebrated simply, as one done in a pandemic. Choosing to stay home + enjoy a long, slow tapas dinner with our closest friends who we’ve been hanging out with throughout the pandemic. It was such a cozy, simple evening. And I so hope that my love had a special, even if it was different, birthday.

Thursday and Friday were freaking gorgeous. We slept in, took it easy, then walked to the park by the river. As I suspected, there were tons of folks out. I was a bit nervous, felt a twinge of guilt, but also saw everyone meeting in small groups + following the guidelines set forth. No masks here, though. Sweden has not receommended the use of masks, saying that it doesn’t really make a difference according to the science they are quoting. I don’t know what to think about that – or what to think about Sweden’s strategy/response in general. But, I don’t think I’m going to go into it here + now. Just know that I have my reservations, my questions, and my confusions. Ultimately, I’m no scientist, so I don’t know what’s best. And it’s still way too early to know if how Sweden is responding is right or not. Still, in my confusion, I am weary + wondering constantly about how we are doing here in Sweden. So, I do what I can. And I limit my time away from home to perhaps one time/week.

But, on this day, when I was out… it was pure bliss. Warm, sunny, alive. We met up with family (the only other people we have hung out with throughout the pandemic), ate ice cream, and watched our niece play. It felt almost normal, but not quite. I think I realized that it felt like the new normal. It will never again feel like it did before March 2020. The world has changed, as it did after 9/11. And here we all are now, finding our way through this experience + learning how life will be as we move forward + onward.

After the park, Lina + I went for a beer at one of out favorite outdoor pubs – Bryggeriet Ångkvarn – before swinging by our friends’ place for a long, cozy evening around the table. Oh my god,I give the pub props. Just so you know. So much credit to Eric and his staff for how amazingly they are following guidelines + ensuring the safety of everyone. We’ve known Eric since they opened a few years ago + I want to spread the word to anyone living in or visiting Uppsala to be sure to stop by and support this local business. They are taking care of all of us – and they have amazing beer, of course!

Friday, we stayed home. Slept late again – oh how much more sleep I need under this pandemic. Basked in the sun in the backyard. And even ate a halloumi burger picnic. Just a slow, quiet, calm day at home. The rest of the weekend was the same actually. Saturday the weather was rainy + cloudy and dreary, but that felt good after 2 days of intense sunshine. And Sunday was a mix of weather. We found ourselves taking the car for a spin to do some errands + then do a little exploring of neighborhoods as well. ‘Cuz we can. Hehe.

As I mentioned above, the new moon happened this past week as well. Just as we began our long weekend, the moon went dark, beginning a new monthly cycle. And, I felt the shift throughout the weekend. The new moon phase is generally about 3 days, so if you’re sensitive + aware, you can feel the energy for a couple of days. I’ve started seeing the new moon phase as a way to feel into the vibes + mood + energy of the month ahead. It’s not one moment in which everything switches, but rather a slow, natural unfolding of energy – moving us ever forward + onward in our evolution. Like as the seasons slowly unfold + move into one another over time. So it is with the phases + cycles of the moon.

In any case, as I had plenty of slow time during the long weekend, I let the feeling of this new moon rise from within. I trusted my intuition to lead + guide me. And what I felt was that everything is changing now. The pandemic, the virus, our daily lives, the world… we are transitioning from the depth of the crisis (it’s still a crisis!) to a time of opening up. I’m not saying that I agree with the decisions of countries to open up or not, nor do I have a research-based opinion on how they open up… I am simply saying that that is what is happening.

This new moon is about emerging. From winter, from early spring, from a pandemic, from our homes, from our souls. So, right now, I am focused on thinking individually + collectively about how to live. How do I want to live? How do we want to live? How has the pandemic changed us? How has quarantine + lockdown + self-isolating changed us? What do I want to bring with me from my time at home (I’m still working from home) when I begin to emerge from this very unique, different way that I have been living since mid-March? What is important to me now? How do I want to show up in this new world?

I have no answers to all of these questions yet. That’s what this month, this moon phase, is all about. Uncovering, discovering, unearthing, listening, deciding… following my intuition as I slowly begin to emerge.

I give great thanks for the time off that I had during this week. The mindful time + the anchoring magic of nature restored my perspective. I have no words at all to truly express what it means to be able to share all of this with my most wonderful wife. And my family, both near + far, who I am able to keep in touch with both in their homes and on Facetime + Zoom, also ground me. What support, love, and inspiration I have.

I hope you are well, dear ones. And, if you need any help, reach out. To me, to someone else. Just ask for help. We need to continue to be here for one another, in whatever ways we can. I’ll keep being here, in this space… just sharing my thoughts + words + images. Sending you all the love I can.

xoxo. liz.

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